Straw Bale Gardening How To

If you would love to grow fruits and vegetables this season, but you have never had success, this gardening method is for you! This will be our third year harvesting all kinds of produce from our own yard, and I was an avowed plant serial killer who lived my life dodging arrest warrants from the EPA for garden genocide. But, no more!

Please click here for the printable/downloadable version of this post.

More info: Straw Bale Gardens Complete by Joel Karsten

Straw Bale Gardening

Benefits

•         Grow an abundance of fresh fruit and veggies at home with ease.
•         No lawn needed. You can garden on an apartment balcony, pavement, a deck, an abandoned lot, a rooftop, anywhere.
•         If you have no time for gardening, you DO have time for straw bale gardening.
•         If you tend to kill all plants, you’ll be shocked that you are not killing plants.
•          No weeding necessary. Ever.
•          No bending. Easy on the knees/back.
•         Impossible to overwater.
•          If your soil is bad, no problem. You’re not using any. No grubs, soil disease, or rocks to deal with.
•          Bales discourage burrowing pests.
•          Enjoy the outdoors.
•          No need to buy a truckload of good soil.
•          All it takes for success is watering every morning (and late afternoon on very hot days).
•          90% maintenance free (almost 100% if you automate watering with a soaker hose and timer!)

Shopping List

·         2 or 3 straw bales (not hay bales), or as many as you want for your space

·         1 bag cheap lawn fertilizer without weed killer or crabgrass preventer, not slow release, and at least 20% nitrogen (like Scotts Turf Builder Lawn Food)

·         1 small bag 10-10-10 general garden fertilizer (like Expert Gardener Flower Food)

·         1 bag planting mix (like MiracleGro Planting Mix)

·         1 roll landscape fabric (or use flattened cardboard boxes)

·         Vegetable/fruit seeds or seedlings

·         Hose or watering can, gardening gloves, trowel, measuring cup, pinwheels to keep birds away

·         Optional (recommended): lawn stakes and chicken wire to surround bales to keep animals out

Note: You’ll have enough leftover fertilizer and planting mix for another 2-3 years. Straw bales can also be reused next season.

 

Straw Bale Gardening in 8 Steps

1.       Plan: First, get your start date. Look up this year’s predicted date of last frost in your area by entering your zip code here: https://morningchores.com/frost-dates/ or Farmer’s Almanac or another site. Then check your calendar for the date that comes NINE DAYS BEFORE THE LAST FROST DATE. Plan to set up your straw bales on that date or soon afterwards. (Example: if the last frost date is May 7^th, then you can set up on April 28^th.)  What’s your setup date this year? ____________________________

Next, decide how many bales you need. If you don’t have a yard and will be using an apartment balcony, 1-2 bales would be good. If you have a driveway, yard, or patio and it’s your first year, maybe 3-4 bales. If you’ve done this before and you kept last year’s bales, you can reuse the bales by propping them up or putting the straw in crates or pots. How many bales do you need to purchase this year? ___________________

Watch your space for a few days. Where is the place in your yard/patio/balcony that receives the most sun? __________________________________________________________________

 

2.       Purchase: Buy straw bales (not hay bales) from a local feed store or craigslist. Likely $10 or under per bale. If you can find organic straw, great. Most people cannot. (Virtually all straw is sprayed with something and it all breaks down over time. It’s very unlikely any will end up in your veggies.) If you don’t have a truck, place a disposable plastic table cloth or tarp in your trunk to avoid getting straw bits all over your car.

 

3.       Place: Arrange your bales north to south in the place in your yard/area that receives the most sun. Place bales so that their straps are on the SIDES of the bales. (The straps should NOT be on top of the bales.) Put landscape fabric or cardboard under bales. You can also put chicken wire under the bales to prevent burrowing, but I never had to do this and I have many critters in my yard. Again, be sure bales are standing with their straps on the SIDES, so the straw is vertical, like grass growing out of the ground.

 

4.       Fertilize/Condition: You have to condition the bales before planting in them. Conditioning takes about 5 minutes a day for 10 days. Day 1: Sprinkle ½ cup lawn fertilizer evenly on top of each bale. Use a hose-end sprayer to spray the fertilizer granules into the tops of the bales. Water bales till water runs out bottom. Day 2: Water only. Water bales till water runs out bottom. Day 3: Sprinkle ½ cup lawn fertilizer on top of each bale. Water them. Day 4: Water only. Day 5: ½ cup lawn fertilizer per bale again. Water bales. Day 6: Water only. Days 7, 8, 9: ¼ cup lawn fertilizer per bale each day and water. Day 10: 1 cup per bale of 10-10-10 general GARDEN fertilizer. Water. Fill in any cracks formed in the conditioning process with straw or sterile planting mix.

 

5.       Plant: After conditioning for 10 days, buy seeds or seedlings and plant them. For plants you are starting from seed, put a 1-2” layer of planting mix--not soil from your yard!--on top of the bale and plant seeds in that. Follow spacing directions on seed packets. Makes no difference if you start from seeds or you’re more comfortable planting seedlings, or you use a mix of both. If you are planting seedlings, you do not need to put a layer of planting mix on top of the bale. Pop the seedlings out of their pots (with potting mix still attached to roots), open up a crack in the bale with a trowel or your hands, and plant the seedling with its potting mix into the crack. Water everything after you’ve planted. Planting tips: If your bales are on pavement or a balcony, I do not recommend pumpkins or melons, as they will need to trail on the ground, spread out, and put some additional roots into soil if you want a lot of them. Tomatoes, cukes and beans are fine anywhere, as long as you give them something to climb (ladder, fence, poles, wire, chair). Potatoes are the only thing planted differently: Stuff the seed potatoes a few inches up into the bottom of the bale, no more than 3 per bale. You can plant radishes or another early crop on top of the potato bale. Potatoes will be ready at the very end of your growing season—October in the northeast. (See “Straw Bale Favorites” below for tips on highest yield crops and how many seeds/seedlings of each you can plant in one bale.)

 

6.       Care: Water each bale for about 2 minutes per bale each morning, aiming at roots of plants (or at seeds if no plants showing yet!). As plants grow, do not water leaves as it can spread disease. It’s impossible to overwater straw bales. Whatever the plants don’t need will simply run out of the bale. If you do not have a hose, empty a gallon water jug twice onto each bale. On hot summer days, water the bales in the late afternoon as well. You should use liquid Miracle Gro or another fertilizer every couple of weeks (except on very new seedlings; wait till they mature a bit). Mushrooms may pop up the first few weeks; this is fine; just ignore them and they will die off. Your bales are composting, which is good.

 

7.       Reap: Pick things as they ripen and enjoy!

 

8.       Protect: You may want to encircle the bale row(s) in chicken wire with some lawn stakes if you’re concerned about rabbits, woodchucks, etc. Though I have tons of rabbits and they never bothered bales, even when I didn’t have fencing up. The bales themselves and the height are a deterrent. If you have deer… you’re going to need higher fencing! Highly recommended: Shiny pinwheels stuck into the bales will completely keep birds and their poop away!

 

 

More info: Straw Bale Gardens Complete by Joel Karsten, SBG Facebook groups, Google, YouTube.

 

Straw Bale Favorites

I like to plant half a bale with one crop and the other half with something else to diversify!

Any herb or flower imaginable: dill, mint, rosemary, basil, zinnias, cosmos. (You can even plant them in the sides of bales to pretty them up and have flowers for vases!)

Beets: 48/bale, 2 crops.

Cabbage: 4/bale, 2 crops.

Green onion: 60/bale, 3+ crops.

Leaf lettuce (start from seed): 30/bale, 4+ crops.

Onion: 48-60/bale, 1 crop.

Radish: 60/bale, 3 crops.

Turnips: 30/bale, 2 crops.

Potatoes (plant lettuce or radish on top): 3/bale, 1 crop.

Tomatoes: 2/bale, 1 crop. NEEDS something to climb. A tomato cage stuck in the bale is a good start. May need propping up later as plant becomes enormous.

Cucumber: 4/bale, 1 crop. NEEDS something to climb. A tomato cage stuck in the bale is a good start. May need propping up later as plant becomes enormous.

Melons: 3/bale, 1 crop.

Peppers: 4/bale, 1 crop.

Pumpkins (Sugar; Jack-Be-Little, etc.): 2/bale, 1 crop.

Jalapenos: 2/bale, several crops.

Watermelon: 2/bale, 1 crop.

Butternut squash, any kind of squash: 2/bale, 1 crop.

Bush beans: 2/bale. Several crops.

Yellow Crook Neck Squash: 2 seedlings/bale. 1 crop.

Zucchini: 4/bale, 1 crop.

Egg plant: 2/bale?

Strawberries (seedlings): 5-6/bale, several crops. But I only recommend in bigger quantities (probably at least 2 bales dedicated only to them) to make it worthwhile, otherwise you probably won’t have enough berries to eat all at once!

I do not recommend carrots in bales. They do not come out carrot-shaped! However, if you have straw left over from last season, which will be somewhat broken down, I bet they would grow very well in that with a 1-2” layer of potting mix on top in a planter. Note: In fact, everything grows well in last year’s straw in whatever pot or container you have hanging around! Just make sure there are a few holes in the bottom of the container for drainage. Don’t waste last year’s straw!

Calling Out Cancel Culture

I posted last week on Facebook regarding Cancel Culture, i.e. Sick. Of. It. I finally did this because Disney fired Mandalorian actress Gina Carano for her political opinion and began cancelling her out with defamatory statements. I then pulled my subscription to Disney+ in response, not for Gina Carano (about whom I know little) but AGAINST Cancel Culture itself, which seeks to destroy people for nonconforming thoughts. To paraphrase, in my post I said I was cancelling a canceller. So much for dramatic flourish! Like one of those tedious Captain Obvious commercials of yesteryear, someone essentially commented, “You used the word cancel twice in the same sentence, haw, haw.” Um, yes. Instead of using the word “boycott,” I made the stylistic choice for a little ironic wordplay. But, as the gotcha comments persisted in seriousness, as if I had been caught red-handed inside a faulty syllogism, I realized there might be an honest misunderstanding of terms among those of us in the conversation. We might simply mean different things when using the same word, Cancel. For some, the term “Cancel Culture” apparently carries no more weight than simply canceling a subscription service one might have. For me and for others who are against the phenomenon, the term “Cancel Culture” is loaded with enough weight to crush the soul of a nation—because it has many times throughout history. So, assuming anyone who disagrees and who has read this far is doing so in a good faith attempt at understanding my perspective, thanks and feel free to read on. We may never agree, but if we agreed all the time that wouldn’t be any fun!

(Alternatively, also feel free to join in by posting petty, mean-spirited memes about Gina Carano that precisely illustrate Cancel Culture itself with a “she should have known better” line of victim-blaming, which shows precisely what can be expected to happen these days if your thoughts deviate from the acceptable script by even one letter. So true! Preach it, meme gods.)

When I talk about Cancel Culture, I’m referring to the practice of de-platforming, defaming, financially ruining, erasing, shaming, slandering, and branding an individual for not sharing every single one of a very specific list of currently acceptable cultural beliefs, whatever they may be Right Now. (It’s hard to keep track of, even for proponents. Like the hypocritical Pharisees heaping new “sins” upon the people in Biblical times, more and more opinions are deemed beyond the pale and sinful as the days go by.) It’s the belief that anyone with a different political opinion should not be allowed to speak, they should not be heard, they should be shouted down and made outcasts never again to find meaningful work; we should go after their families; send death threats and harassment at all turns; dig up uncharitable quotes from high school and baselessly call them misogynists, racists, fascists. It is a ghoulish movement based on unforgiveness, sin, and division. There are many other branches to this, and I’m oversimplifying (it’s a blog post!), but these are the hallmarks of what I’m talking about when referring to Cancel Culture.

While Cancel Culture is a movement of the progressive “left” at this moment, it is a tactic that has been used by all sides throughout history. The “right” used it during the McCarthy era to ruin suspected communists, jail them, cast them out, impoverish them in every way. When taken to its most horrific degree, it results in not just “idea cleansing” but “cleansing” plain and simple, as in religious zealots burning through witches in Salem, or atheist zealots and the atrocities of their totalitarian governments of the last century. Cancel Culture is used as a tool of terror out of the terror of losing power. Oftentimes, and perhaps as the most cruel twist of fate, it cycles back around rather than dies out because a group of people has been truly oppressed, has now thrown off the oppression, and then gives into the temptation for revenge, rather than grace, falling into the evil they once overthrew.

I have not made a political post on social media in quite a long time. I don’t find it worthwhile. But last week, Disney fired and began defaming an actress for having political opinions they purport to disagree with. (Side note: It is difficult to know if they actually disagree with them, or if they are simply scared of not disagreeing about it in public. Cancel Culture may seem like freedom to proponents, but it is really a restrictive prison for them, which does not allow for false moves. The Culture eats its own and forgiveness is not seen as a virtue there, even when groveling apologies are issued.) Rumor has it that Disney had wanted to fire Carano for some time (again, merely because of political views), but the final straw came when she tweeted about the creep of totalitarianism, and how neighbor being led to hate neighbor is the first step in that system. With apparently no trace of irony, Disney then fired her and drummed up hatred for her by calling her anti-Semitic and intolerant of other religions. (Only in Disney’s America can you tweet about the evils of Nazi Germany and also be anti-Semitic! I guess someone should tell Ben Shapiro, who is Jewish and just hired Carano to produce her own movie.) You can make an argument that a private company can hire and fire whomever they want. But is there an honest argument to be made that it is okay for Disney to instantly come out and smear an actress’s character in one of the most despicable ways possible? Accusations of anti-Semitism? Abhorring other cultures and religions? Imagine how difficult it is for the wrongly accused to come back from such accusations, especially in light of the loudness and pervasiveness of Cancel Culture. (Spoiler alert: Lives have been ruined.) Meanwhile, Pedro Pascal, the star of the same show Carano got fired from, had made frequent online references to those who don’t agree with his politics as Nazis for years, and Disney has not so much as uttered a statement about it and he still has his starring role (as he should). Can an honest argument be made that Disney is justified in cancelling Carano but not Pascal…?

I usually let Cancel Culture slide without mention. “Cancellings” like this happen all the time. It’s the moment we’re in. But I was so revolted by the double standard and hypocrisy on display with Disney’s move last week with the defamation of those who don’t share their views, that I canceled my Disney+ subscription and posted about it on Facebook to let people know they aren’t alone if things like this bother them. I’ll still cherish memories of our family in Disneyworld, watch Disney films, pack my preschooler’s Minnie Mouse lunchbox each morning, celebrate the good things about their creations. But I’m not going to pay Disney any more money for a subscription to watch a show I love when they used that very show to embrace the bully tactics of Cancel Culture.

Unfortunately, Disney’s is only one of the most recent examples of a very long string of Cancel Culture character assassinations and trashings of people’s lives—and not only actors, but “regular” people, college professors, doctors, neighbors. Many people (from many political backgrounds) have spoken with me since my Facebook post and said they agree and are afraid to say anything in agreement online or anywhere else. Even if one doesn’t get “cancelled,” a commitment to Free Speech and open discourse will significantly lower your standing in the eyes of many, and instantly align you with every evil “ism” out there. I’m well aware people can’t believe what a confused, unenlightened rube I am because I don’t fit the mold and I’m “against accountability.”

What can we do rather than ruin/cancel each other out of fear? A better way to handle an opinion you don’t like is to use your free will, something we all have. If you didn’t agree with the actress in question, you could have A) ignored what she said because who cares, or B) stopped watching the show, or C) either A or B plus try to convince others of the wrongness of her views, not by destroying her or blocking her out, but by talking with people. (When Pascal made his Nazi comments, I chose “A.” Really, who cares.) Was the actress doing a poor acting job? Was she breaking laws? Espousing racist views? No? Then what business does Disney have firing her and making a statement defaming her, and yet keeping Pascal on? Why not simply let people decide for themselves if an actress’s views are worth their time or not? Would that be too freeing for the dumb, unwashed masses?

My friends supporting Cancel Culture refer to it as “accountability” or a similar term. And I agree that we do need to hold public figures (or any individual) accountable for harming others, breaking laws, lying, etc. Also, private companies can surely choose who they want representing them and hire or fire based on that. But neither individuals nor companies have the right to attempt to annihilate someone through slander because of differing political opinions. Trying to absolutely silence and then destroy someone’s life for holding a differing opinion is not the same as accountability. It is oppression. And it can happen to you, even if you’re sitting pretty on top of the Cancel Tower. All it takes is one “wrong” move.

How can we have some real accountability for crappy ideas? Wacky/loony/irrational/evil ideas have less chance of gaining a strong foothold in the marketplace of Free Speech—IF THERE IS FREE SPEECH. MORE speech is what rids society of poor ideas, not less. Debate, listening, discussion, forgiveness as opposed to throwing a tantrum and shouting people down or blackballing them; that’s the real cure. It keeps us on our toes. Makes us question, hone, evolve. Stuffing Play-Doh into our ears in the campus Safe Room just makes us incompetent, unempathetic, intellectually impoverished, and doomed to repeat the bad ideas of history—of which Cancel Culture is one.

There are many things on which honest and well-educated minds can disagree or be nuanced about. There are many topics on which the science is young and we don’t know what we don’t know yet. WE are very young, too, all of us. We don’t get many years. And there are also many topics which we can never fully grasp because they are of a spiritual nature and here we are on a physical plane. And it’s okay! I might be wrong on some things. You might be wrong on some things. Or we might both be a little right, who knows? We do not all have to think the same and agree on every single thing to be decent human beings. Likewise, if we disagree on some things or have some lame or even dangerous ideas, it does not necessarily mean we are any kind of “ist” (misogynist, racist, bigot……. ist….). Sometimes it does, but in the vast majority of cases it does not.

It’s Ash Wednesday. We all come from the same dust—even atheists agree on that. Let’s stop trying to bury people in it out of revenge and extend a little compassion, or at least a little “live and let live.” I won’t use the word “tolerance.” It’s bloodless, empty, sterile, dated. Kindness is pretty toothless and wishy-washy too, when it comes down to it.

Is love for neighbor too old fashioned and out of reach?

Veiled and Unveiled: The Nakedness of Liturgical Head Covering

Have you ever been curious about a woman sitting near you in church wearing a mantilla? If you’re a woman, have you ever been alarmed to find yourself clipping a chapel veil to your own hair for the first time? And you live in 21^st century AMERICA. And you’re not even a NUN. But Jesus’ love is both curious and alarming; one should dress for the occasion. Ideally, we –both men and women—dress ourselves interiorly for the Wedding Feast of the Lamb every day, but outwardly dressing the part can also be a beautiful symbol and reminder that the Bridegroom consummated this marriage with us on the cross, is here with us now in the Eucharist, and comes again.

I have noticed a handful of women in my parish wearing veils. While I’ve been discerning the practice for some years, I do not yet wear a chapel veil regularly and don't know that I ever will. But, for the past few years, I have worn a veil at the Great Easter Vigil, the apex of the liturgical year, full of solemnity and joy, longing and intimacy, familiarity and wonder –all the paradoxes of a Church that could only possibly have been created by God Himself. The Sacrifice of the Mass is a banquet that could only be set out by a madman by worldly standards, but by the God-man madly in love with his spotless, virginal bride by God’s standards. “This is My Body; take, eat.” It’s almost too much to bear. So, when words fail, veil.

Each day I try to some degree to dress my heart as He sees me. At least, I want to. I can’t say this has been a stellar year for that, or a stellar life. But when I wear my heart’s invisible veil on my head for that one night at the Easter Vigil, it somehow resolves my Yes to His gift anew. And with a mantilla, I do not stand with my face covered. Quite the opposite: the lace is draped only over my hair, perpetually at the point in the wedding ceremony where the Groom has just lifted His bride’s veil revealing her face to Him and to herself in His eyes. Veils are sometimes referred to as “head coverings” and I have to smile when I hear that. A veil worn out of sheer love covers nothing at all. It is the most naked you will ever be in public. And if you just keep looking into His eyes you will forget you ever cared that anyone else would see.

Jesus does not look at you and see your less-than-stellar year or your less-than-stellar life. All times are Now to God. He knew you before you ever sinned and were only carrying the weight of the Happy Fault that brings us to this Easter. He also knows you as you are with Him in heaven when this life is done and you have poured out what little you can offer for Him and have come out the other side of purgatory, radiant in His love and forevermore untouched by any stain of sin. Veil your heart for so patient and sure a Bridegroom! If you give your resounding yes, do you not believe He will make you holy? He turns water into wine, wine into Blood, and Blood into eternal life! As unlikely and undeserved as it is, you are beautiful and holy to Him. Give yourself to Him as the bride you are, the bride He sees you as, holding nothing back. What better symbol is there of this mutual laying down of lives than a bride’s veil, a veil that bares the soul?

Note: This is merely one reason why I wear a veil for Easter. I neither claim to speak for all women who wear veils, nor do I claim that all women should wear veils. But, I do get the sense the Church is not enriched by the sudden dropping of the ancient tradition of veiling from the liturgical books a handful of decades ago.

O Sacrament Most Holy

It's First Friday and the weekend of the Feast of Corpus Christi, and I've had this winter journal entry on my mind today.  All praise and all thanksgiving be every moment Thine.

Exposition

Through a glass brightly, the Sun in the luna.

From God’s mouth has gone forth in righteousness

A Word that shall not return void—

Brother, Lord and Lover to the end of the age—

A consummation none can bear as he is.

Speak to me like a child.

Thanks be for Your gentle veiling,

Seeming grains of wheat offering tenderly

The Light pierced and piercing, outshining

The gold of any monstrance.  A polished encirclement

Worthless itself, yet beyond price as

The peek-hole to eternity

Pressed to the white burial shroud over Your chest,

Wild and beating Sacred Heart.




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Blessed Sacrament clipart from imgsoup.com

On the Drive Home

As I was driving back into town late this afternoon, feeling sick and claustrophobic in my own chest, I realized after hours of busyness and errands I'd become stuck inside myself.  Immediately, I lifted my eyes and called out, the obvious remedy.  And, in that same moment, my sight was drawn from the clarity of the blue sky to one silver-trunked tree, very tall amidst the forest lining the road.  It's branches were outstretched in joyful surrender to the sky with pale leaves like tiny mirrors flashing on a wind-chime as the breeze moved them.  I saw the forest better for that tree; the many ordinary maples and oaks surrounding this rooted light were not ordinary, and the occasional purple-red treetop stood out in contrast to those of a green shade but detracted nothing from them.  The rare dash of color in fact completed the whole with a harmony no human or accident could ever arrange.  And all of these trees, in branching out to one another, touched that swaying silver beauty and the heavens that were reflected on its leaves in the sun.  In that, their own magnificence was revealed.  That glistening tree, like a ladder, could not help but draw everything straight upward and outward, including my own mind, which one second before had been so cramped and consumed with dwelling.  I followed that tree up every twinkling branch, and all the visual noise of houses and telephone poles and litter disappeared, leaving a natural world that points to the paradise that is our Home and deepest longing.

As I drove past the tree I was overcome by gratitude in the wonder and splendor of marriage and the co-creation that flows from it, of the communion of saints, and of the astonishing truth that this is only the beginning for all of us.  And, that is Hope.  Not wishful thinking, but Easter --real, Christian Hope.  In that Hope I felt radiant that through God's perfect design of our vocation my husband and I are blessed to not only bring souls into the world, but to help one another to someday be together where the tree of life has its source.  If you ever feel stuck inside your own head, call the Source by name.  He will lift you up to places unexpected.  Whatever your vocation, married, single, priestly or religious, you're far from alone on this drive Home.

You Know You're a Catholic When...

Since my last blog post about Saint Catherine I have written nothing.  And, now, I present it to you!

You Know You’re a Catholic When…

1.  Sometime in the month of May, you find yourself chasing your alarmed 2nd grader around the house with a glass of wine pleading, “All you need to do is take one little sip!  You’ll love it!”

2.  You go to the customer service desk to retrieve your lost purse or backpack, and when they ask you to describe the contents you mention at least three of the following:  rosary, small set of fetal models, crucifix, basal thermometer, holy card, hay from a crèche, scapular, photo of your son dressed as the pope getting kissed by the pope.  (Whoa, that mom is Catholic.)

3.  At a stoplight, you suddenly realize people in the car next to you are staring because it looks like you’re checking to see if your deodorant is working, but really you just love the smell of incense so much and it’s on your jacket.  Awkward.

4.  You’ve ever been elated to discover we have a Saint Chewbacca…

14th century relief by unknown artist.  Photo by PKO, Wikimedia Commons user.  GNU Free Documentation License.

5.  …only to feel the sting of disappointment when you realize, no, actually that’s Mary Magdalene.  (Whose idea was that statue, anyway?)

6.  You have one of THOSE drawers in your nightstand.  You know the one I’m talking about.

Boom.  That drawer.

7.  Disgusted neighbors accuse you of contributing to the over-commercialization of Christmas because your entire family is dressed in red already and it’s barely even the beginning of summer.  “Isn’t it bad enough that retailers play Christmas music in August, and now here you are trying to get us to shop even earlier!  Who paid you off?!”

It's Pentecost, people.

8.  Your homemade ice cream sundaes come out looking like famous nun saints.

Tearful Children:  "Mommy, it burns!  It burns!"  Mom:  "Yes!  Her heart is a flaming cinnamon candy because it's on fire with the Holy Spirit!"

9.  A)  Your children invite you to a pretend Mass in your living room, and B) during said “Mass” your decision to leave your toddler at home on Sundays for now is vividly validated as he crashes onto the “altar” with a large plastic T-rex screaming “raaaaaaaawwwwwwwwwwwwr” at the pretend priest and altar server.

10.  You literally want to marry Jesus.  And, as astounding as this is, you know He wants to marry you, too.

The Lily and the Lotus: Saint Catherine vs. the Self-Help Aisle

Saint Catherine of Siena by Arthur Hughes

"Bless me, Father, for I have kept two of our parish library books out far beyond what I imagine the due dates must have been.  It's been a month since my last confession.  If I squint with my brain I'm pretty sure that's 1/8th of the time I've had these books out."  Maybe that's how I should start my next confession?  It's not as if I can claim ignorance about the way libraries work, having managed the circulation department of an academic library for years, sending out overdue notices and/or the mob when students did not return materials on time.  Like the doctor who is a terrible patient, I'm a former library employee who is a lousy book-borrower.  Breaking the habit might require absolution.


The books in question are a biography of my parish's patroness, Saint Catherine of Siena, and also her own Dialogue with God.  I have stubbornly hung onto these volumes, telling myself all through Advent and Lent that I would make time to read them.  But, then I would find a toddler without his pants in the next room, or it would take an hour and 15 minutes at the town hall to register a car, or I would nod off because I'd had such a busy day of chasing a pantsless toddler, maybe even while trying to register my car.  Finally, this Easter season, 10 days before the feast of St. Catherine, I decided I was going to binge-read both books.  Even if it took staying up past midnight for a week, I would read every last page and get to know more about our patron saint and strike up a friendship with her.  Then, on her feast day, I would participate in the timeless ritual of dressing in black and clinging to the shadows while making my way to the after-hours parish book drop, after which I would pretend I had not just senselessly kept these titles from other parishioners for more than half a year.

The feast of St. Catherine was on April 29th, and I still have the books, but not only because of the typical excuses.  I have actually started to read the Dialogue, which led me to the discovery that I cannot "binge-read" St. Catherine.  I'm still on page 11 of her conversation with God.  All of her writing invites or even demands due reflection.  On a good day, I can "binge" on a few pages; on another day, just a fragment of a sentence.  In the first half of a statement, the woman mystically wedded to Christ will start off saying something a pop psychologist would laud, but then she'll conclude the thought with nothing I have ever heard issuing from the mouths of Oprah or Dr. Phil.  For example:

"[I remain] in the cell of self-knowledge, in order to know better the goodness of God toward [me]."

What?  But, this article from Chopra.com lists a bunch of things meditation --also called "me time" by the author-- will teach me about myself, and none of it leads to knowing God is good to me, or even that God exists and I am a created being.  "The more consistent you are in your meditation practice, the more you come to understand about yourself, which is the source of freedom and fulfillment in life.  . . . By taking the time to sit and be with yourself in silence, you practice kindness, compassion, love, patience, flexibility, and acceptance," says the blog.  But, in the pages following her above quote, Saint Catherine demonstrates that pride masquerading as self- "compassion" or "acceptance" is not the end result of true self-knowledge.  Honest self-knowledge leads to pride's opposite:  humility.  And, since humility is the first movement of self-sacrificing love, entering into the "cell of self-knowledge" to attain it is critical:  ". . . humble and continuous prayer founded on knowledge of [self] and of God . . . unites with God the soul that follows the footprints of Christ crucified, and thus, by desire and affection, and union of love, makes her another Himself."  Knowing ourselves with all of our flaws and limitations coupled with the knowledge of the multitude of blessings we have all been given, the greatest of all being God's Only Begotten Son, leads to a keen awareness of the "goodness of God" to us, and in turn leads to loving God "who first loved us" (1 John 4: 19).  This responding love is a fire in the Spirit, an all-consuming offering of ourselves to God and to others as we, in St. Catherine's words, "become another Himself," another Christ.

This idea flies in the face of another hallowed slogan of our post-Christian cultural gurus, namely that we must love ourselves before we can love anyone else.  Even the Bible's "love your neighbor as yourself" would seem to agree with our modern mantra.  The popularly peddled prescription is that we need to "give ourselves permission to pamper ourselves," repeat daily affirmations about our own greatness, or simply get in a quiet place and envision ourselves on a peaceful beach for 15 minutes a day, and then, as long as it doesn't hurt too much (because suffering has no value), maybe we will be ready to "love someone else" --but, only if we truly feel cherishing and compassionate towards ourselves.  If you're not quite there yet, you need more "you time" and will understandably have to hold off on loving others, perhaps indefinitely, except the type of good-deed-doing that makes you feel good.  By and large, that's our society's position.  However, lest the inventors of Comfortably Airbrushed Jesus forget, that was not His position.  He gave us a "new commandment":  to love one another as HE has loved us (John 13:34).  We must first humble ourselves, which will lead to contemplation and realization of the unfathomable depth of God's love for us; in this knowledge we will respond and love as He does.  The closer we are to loving as He loves, the closer we are to truly loving our neighbor.  And, how much does He love us?  He gave everything for us, as unworthy as we are, willingly going to his death so we might live.  St. Catherine tells us we must know ourselves honestly to begin to understand this love God has for us, which will lead us to returning His love, and so transform us into "another Himself" for the world.  Self-knowledge, according to St. Catherine, leads not to self-worship or self-cuddling or complacency but to humility, which God tells the saint is the "foster-mother and nurse of charity."  This is not the sterile, feel-good "charity" of mindlessly tossing some coins in a jar in the checkout line.  It is caritas, a word full of life and blood and passion and danger, a word that consumes as it multiplies.  It is agape love.  Humility is the "foster-mother and nurse" of this Love that is Christ.  God continues to St. Catherine:

"In self-knowledge, then, thou wilt humble thyself, seeing that, in thyself, thou dost not even exist; for thy very being, as thou wilt learn, is derived from Me, since I have loved both thee and others before you were in existence; and that, through the ineffable love which I had for you, wishing to re-create you to Grace, I have washed you, and re-created you in the Blood of My only-begotten Son, spilt with so great a fire of love.  This Blood teaches the truth to him, who, by self-knowledge, dissipates the cloud of self-love, and in no other way can he learn."

We do well to truly know ourselves as St. Catherine knew herself, so that we might be humble enough to "know better the goodness of God" to us and in that knowledge sprint into that Love and Truth with all of our strength.

Bless me, Father, for I have sinned.  I have been lazy in spiritual reading and inconsiderate of the parish library and anyone who may have wanted to borrow these books while they lay on my nightstand untouched for months.  But, that is an easy, superficial thing to admit, however slightly embarrassing.  It's the Get-Out-of-Jail-Free Card of confessions.  Compared with the behemoth of my pride, it is the absolute least of my flaws.  May God help me to truly grasp this, so I may be led to know Him, the joy that loved me into existence, and I may become that Love in the world.  Amen.

Keep "Hallow" in Halloween!

Now, that’s a bumper sticker I want to see, and I wouldn’t be shy about displaying it this time of year on the posterior of the family minivan, the anterior of which is lovingly adorned with the ubiquitous rearview mirror rosary, the middle of which is filled with any number of giggling be-costumed children, usually our own.  The secular culture –as well as many Catholics, it seems—has forgotten that All Hallows’ Eve is a night of merriment prior to the feast of All Saints/Hallows Day on November 1^st.  I think it’s time to start reminding ourselves and our children.  Ironically, worrying that Halloween was a “pagan” celebration is allowing it to turn into one.

Many local Christian cultures throughout the ages have gone door-to-door for treats on the eve of various Christian feasts, not only Halloween.  But it has been fashionable for some time to claim that Christianity placed the feast of All Saints on November 1^st in order to co-opt the Druidic celebration of Samhain, which involved dressing in costume and going door-to-door.  It is less fashionable to point out that there was no reason to do this because All Saints Day for the entire Church was declared by Pope Gregory sometime in the early 700s, three centuries after Ireland had already been thoroughly converted by Saint Patrick.  There was no need to sneak Christianity in the back door; it had long since been let in through the front.  But regardless of history, every Halloween, Catholic blogs are peppered here and there with comments likening the practice of trick-or-treating to cooperating with the pervasive “culture of death,” and/or reveling in pagan practices, and urging us to close our curtains and pretend we’re not home on this supposed evening of satanic worship.  I understand where the hand-wringing comes from; as Christians, we are called to do everything with Christ in view, and we wonder how He can fit into this oversexed and black picture painted for us by countless fly-by-night costume stores that sprout up every September.  I see a clue in one of my favorite hymns, which was just recently played at a colleague’s memorial service:

I danced on a Friday when the world turned black 
It's hard to dance with the devil on your back 
They buried my body, they thought I was gone 
But I am the dance, and the dance goes on 

Dance, dance, wherever you may be 
I am the lord of the dance, said he 
And I lead you all, wherever you may be 
And I lead you all in the dance, said he 

They cut me down and I leapt up high 
I am the life that will never, never die 
I'll live in you if you'll live in me 
I am the Lord of the dance, said he 

Christ is not just joy, He is absolute bliss, even dancing out of death.  And, all of the saints in the canon, whom we celebrate on November 1^st now live in this bliss as they followed our Lord's lead in the great dance.  Most importantly, these were just flawed, regular people like you and I!  Some of them were even more irascible than I can be.  (A FEW, my husband reminds me.)  Because Jesus died, rose and opened the gates to heaven, we can actually hope and strive to be there ourselves someday.  If that isn’t reason enough to laugh at sting-less death, to stick it in the devil’s eye, and to eat tons and tons of candy, I don’t know what is.

Are there certain practices of the secular version of our holiday we should not assimilate?  Sure.  When the choices your 7-year-old has for costumes at iParty are “Sexy Police Officer,” “Sexy Maid,” “Sexy Igor” (?), “Sexy Vampire,” and “Sexy Undertaker,” you might Catholically consider turning to an ancient Druidic practice after all:  Making Your Own Costume.  Some Catholic families dress up as saints for Halloween, which can be a helpful practice for tying the festivities of Hallows’ Eve in with the actual holiday it anticipates, All Saints Day.  But, as long as we don’t sink into the deeply disturbing macabre, a veneration of gore itself and the antithesis of true Hallows’ Eve, I also see nothing wrong with allowing children to dress up as ghosts and goblins and go “boo!” at each other in mockery of “all the evil spirits who prowl about the world seeking the ruin of souls” (Prayer to St. Michael).  As long as we dance the Lord’s dance they can’t touch us in the end.  Speaking of Saint Michael, even he mocks the devil by his very name, a rhetorical and almost sarcastic question as he closes the gates of hell on him, “Who is like God?”  Seriously, Satan?  You close the curtains and pretend you aren’t home.  More candy for us.

Top 15 Non-Catholic Songs That Are Catholic*

Even St. Jerome can't resist these beats.  Okay, maybe somewhere up there King David has to prod him into it a little.  Crack a smile, Jerry.

For a blur of time that may have been years, the audio atmosphere of my mini-van was composed alternately of talk radio punctuated by brief periods of silence on rare solo drives, or the cacophony of three small children with varying grasps of grammar and vocabulary belting out "I Want You Back" by the Jackson 5 (long story).  It was only on rare occasions I would scan through FM radio, most new songs being unfamiliar and undesirable territory that I'd simply skip past.  But, this year while driving alone I've found myself hanging out in the FM a bit more often, realizing in the middle of things that I'm singing some secular anthem as if it were a glorious hymn, wing-delivered by dove, because the song speaks to me of Jesus and the Church.  This would probably cause some of the artists --not to mention some fellow Catholics-- a shudder of horror on principle, on the songs not being intended that way.  But, I can't help myself.  If God wants to surprise me on Kiss 108 FM every now and then, who am I to tell Him to get back on my Gregorian chant CD where He belongs?  We should probably worry more about where we don't see God than where we do.

Before anyone readies the pillory, know that I don't mean to suggest these tunes are up there with Bach, or the lyrics are the Hound of Heaven, or that listening to the entire Billboard 100 is a mystical experience.  There are too many warped songs on the mainstream airwaves, and there is still an awful lot of skipping that goes on when I'm listening to the radio --too much for any passenger to stand!  I'm not endorsing any artists as role models or suggesting anyone watch their performances; I don't know enough about either and I'm not interested for the most part.  But I do know that amidst all the noise and unredeemable cheer-leading for the "culture of death" are some releases of the past couple years that discerning Catholics can reclaim from the rocky shallow end and toss out into the floating freedom of the daring deep if the spirit moves them.  Merry mischief-making!  If nothing else, at least it may turn your teen toward classical music as she tries to avoid being locked in a car with you dancing to her station.

*  This very list is also reason #3 on the Top Three Reasons I Will Never Make Church Choir.  (Reasons #1 and #2 are:  I sort of have a male's singing voice in a woman's body, and, also, I have the vocal range of a goose, respectively.  Runner-up for #3 is I can't read music.)  Incidentally,this list is also reason #1 why my own adult stepdaughter will not friend me on Facebook.

Top 15 Pop Songs of 2000-2014 That Didn't Mean to Be Catholic But Are

A Sky Full of Stars by Coldplay:  I wanted to dislike this song for its generic club track feel when I first heard it.  But, to my annoyance and then joy it quickly pulled me in with simple lyrics that crystallize absolute surrender in love to Christ who consumes us.  "'Cause you're a sky, 'cause you're a sky full of stars/ I wanna die in your arms/ 'Cause you get lighter the more it gets dark/ I'm gonna give you my heart/ I don't care, go on and tear me apart/ I don't care if you do/ 'Cause in a sky, in a sky full of stars/ I think I see you."

A Thousand Years by Christina Perri:  "How to be brave?/  How can I love when I'm afraid to fall?/  But watching you stand alone/ All of my doubt suddenly goes away somehow/ One step closer..."  This could be a sweet dialogue between Jesus and any one of us, a response to the gentle but unrelenting invitation to approach the Lord on the altar and be cleansed.  And, naturally, the song is equally beautiful as a love song between two souls meeting each other on their way to living their vocation of marriage.  As the Bible demonstrates, it's no accident that many songs which illuminate self-giving love between spouses and the indissoluble union that is a sacramental marriage also work perfectly as songs between ourselves and Christ.  Sing them to your spouse and to God; they are for both.

Babel by Mumford and Sons:  Look at the title.  "I know my weakness/ Know my voice/ And I believe in grace and choice."

Best Day of My Life by American Authors:  Maybe there are a few oddball lines, but the unleashed, rollicking laughter of the music and the tickling of the strings makes me want to burst out and swing around at least 3 kids and a couple monkeys.  I'm pretty sure Jesus felt like that frequently, though the Master of joy didn't need a ridiculous song to get there.  You know young St. Francis would totally roll down a grassy hill to this song.  How great is the refrain for receiving a sacrament, baptism, marriage, holy orders --or the Eucharist!  Isn't every day you receive the Eucharist the best day of your life?  Don't you want to dance up the aisle sometimes?  "This is gonna be the best day of my liiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiife/ My li-i-i-i-i-ife."

Hallelujah by Jeff Buckley:  Hmm.  Maybe this one was Catholic almost on purpose, considering all the Biblical allusions.  It's a piercing but, I think, potentially hopeful song in that the character is realizing, through painful experience, that love is not merely a feeling but a choice, or a series of daily choices.  No matter how broken you are, there is hope once you realize what love is Not and start turning yourself to what it Is:  laying down one's life for another (John 15:13).

Halo by Beyonce Knowles:  Truly fitting for that moment it dawns in you that not only was Jesus not a charlatan, he was also not simply a "good man" or "wise teacher" who lived over 2,000 years ago; rather, He's actually the living God incarnate who has come for YOU.  "Everywhere I'm looking now/ I'm surrounded by your embrace/ Baby, I can see your halo/ You know you're my saving grace."  It's so much more messy and thrilling than when we try to keep God at arm's length.  Listen to it while driving in the pouring rain if you can, and hear the thousands of knees falling to the ground.  "I pray it won't fade away" --This one line reminds me of what Tolkien says about the resurrection:  "There is no tale ever told that men would rather find was true, and none which so many skeptical men have accepted as true on its own merits."  It's too Good to be true, but it is True!  It can be very moving to wrest this song from the emptiness of the "throwaway culture" and offer Beyonce's beautiful voice to God who gave it to her and from Whom all beauty comes.

Happy by Pharrell Williams:  Easter!  Death, where is your sting?  "Here come bad news, talkin this and that/ Well, give me all you got and don't hold it back/ I should probably warn you I'll be just fine/ No offense to you, don't waste your time/ Cuz I'm happy"

I Will Wait by Mumford and Sons:  It's the best Advent song of the last, er, two years.  Also, the way I see it, it's a song that works as well for singing of sanctifying grace between spouses or as a prayer of the consecrated religious to the Lord.  It is a rousing and triumphant song for all the Church Militant, for anyone who puts God before himself, caught up in a Love so overcoming he has to pray for the strength for his heart to even bear it.  "Bow my head/ Keep my heart slow/ 'Cause I will wait/ I will wait for you!"

Little Talks by Of Monsters and Men:  This song is Pope Benedict's "dictatorship of relativism" in action, a couple virtually destroyed by living the lies of the world.  But, somewhere in the background is the Barque of Peter that just might save them.  "Though the truth may vary/ This ship will carry our bodies safe to shore."

Pompeii by Bastille:  In every age, at some time or another it feels like the world must be coming to an end, whether by natural disaster or war or schism or anything else we don't have control over.  But, despite the chorus's "How am I gonna be an optimist about this?" there's some strange hope in all of it.  Yes, remember to be an optimist.  And remember, too, that the world hasn't ended any of those times.  Yes, for the dead this world ended; but, we know that death is not the final word.  For those left behind?  Rebuild.  "Where do we begin?/ The rubble or our sins?"  Build up the kingdom.  Cherish that indestructible gem of a Church that holds fast in every era and emerges from the wreckage perhaps smaller at times, but always brighter and stronger.

Shake it Out by Florence + The Machine:  This could be the soundtrack for wrestling with starting on the path to conversion.  Wrestling and winning, then losing, then winning, losing... "It's hard to dance with the devil on your back, so shake him off."

Speed of Sound by Coldplay:  We are engulfed in mystery upon mystery.  Sometimes it is hard to quiet the mind and just be immersed.  "The sign that I couldn't read/ Or a light that I couldn't see/ Some things you have to believe/ But others are puzzles, puzzling me."  Other times we can get out of our own way enough to know things we can't explain.  "If you could see it then you'd understand."

Viva la Vida by Coldplay:  How Biblical:  A sham ruler of a sham kingdom not built on God's word is blindsided and left with nowhere else to turn but to Him.  See my previous post with more on this song.

You Are A Tourist by Death Cab for Cutie:  The name of the band should be an automatic disqualifier.  Who would have thought the Holy Spirit could be found in Death Cab for Cutie?  "When there's a burning in your heart/ An endless yearning in your heart/ Build it bigger than the sun/ Let it grow/ Let it grow/ When there's a burning in your heart/ Don't be alarmed."  Ready for an extreme sport?  Pentecost is S-C-A-R-Y.  Dive in!  No bungee cords allowed.

Boom Clap by Charli XCX:  This one is out of alphabetical order, you say?  Okay, maybe I hid it at the bottom of the list because I'm a bit embarrassed.  It's for the teeny bopper in all of us.  If the Lord doesn't make you go weak in the knees maybe you should visit Him more often.  If St. Augustine can "pant for [God]," then God can make my heart go "BOOM, CLAP," okay?  "Just tell me what to do/ I'll fall right into you."

You're welcome, screen-writers for Sister Act Three.

Of Baptisms and Bigotry



Post-publication update:  I received several notes and spoken words of vigorous agreement on the version of this post that appeared in my local newspaper.  To my joy, a lot of the kudos even came from people who are not Catholic, but who see the sense in the position.  Thank you!  However, in re-reading my writing below, I believe I was woefully unclear about one critical point and I hope I did not accidentally skew anyone's understanding.  When reading this post, please keep in mind, a child is never refused baptism in the Catholic Church due to the sins of the parents, whatever they may be.  (That would be kind of contrary to the point of baptism, wouldn't it!)  Parishes, of course, may have certain requirements for baptizing as well as for other sacraments, a most logical one being that the one receiving baptism, first communion, etc., must be a member of the parish and regular attendee of Mass for a certain amount of time prior.  Among other things, this is an indication that the parishioner truly believes the Catholic faith and also it is preparation for receiving the sacrament.  Not being registered at a parish and not attending Mass are valid reasons for a delay in receiving baptism, matrimony, etc.  The remedy for this is for families to register with a parish and become active in Catholic life.  With this clarification in mind, read on! 


In my local newspaper there is a "Thumbs Up/Thumbs Down" section where people air important compliments or grievances anonymously and succinctly, such as, "Thumbs down to my jerk of a neighbor.  Your shrubs are ugly!  Stop uglifying my street!" or "Thumbs up, snugglepuff!  Good job at the mini-golf tournament last weekend!  Great strategizing on the spinning monkey hole."  There has recently been a spate of Thumbs Down comments regarding a local Catholic church that declined to baptize a baby whose parents are not registered with the parish and do not attend Mass.  The comments have gradually become more anti-Catholic over the weeks.  For example:

“Thumbs up to the parents of the baby who St. Kathryn’s won’t baptize, and therefore, won’t be raised Catholic.  I’m sad that you are going through this mess, but in the long run, do you really want your child raised in the Catholic faith given the issues they have had with pedophiles?  I’m a non-practicing Catholic myself who stopped going to church when I realized how messed up the church really was.  I would have my child baptized by another Christian group instead.”

Thumbs up to not being raised a Catholic!  Stay away from those messed up pedophiles, snugglepuff!  They don't even trim their ugly shrubs!

I submitted a response to the newspaper vitriol as a letter to the editor, which was published here.  I kept the letter brief in order to fit within the publishing parameters.  Below is an expanded version.  Now, if you'll excuse me, I have some shrubs to tend.

..............

Thumbs Down to Intolerant Comments About the Catholic Church

The repeated anti-Catholic “thumbs down” comments arising because St. Kathryn’s church refused to baptize a child whose parents do not plan to raise him/her in the Catholic faith are misguided and an affront to Catholics and to logic itself.  Does it make any sense for parents to baptize a child in a Catholic church while they do not attend Mass and intend to continue being absent from Mass each weekend?  Catholics are required by their very religion to attend Mass every week and on holy days of obligation.  When we don’t, we are called to recognize our sin, confess, and return.  The parents of the child do not attend Mass and apparently do not intend to do so going forward, otherwise baptism would have been allowed in the future.  The simple remedy for the parents is to start attending Mass –exercising their faith-- if they want their child baptized in the Catholic Church.  It is not for the priest to change the religion to suit them.  Our creed says we believe in “one, holy, catholic and apostolic church.”  If you do not believe in the Church’s teachings and do not attempt to follow them, why would you want to have a Catholic baptism?  Is it a good luck charm?  An excuse for having a party?  Something that requires no action on the part of parents, like the event of baby’s first tooth?  “Aw, look, baby is baptized!  Isn’t that precious.”  Catholics believe baptism is a sacrament, a holy and intimate moment between humankind and God.  It’s not simply a photo op for baby in a cute formal outfit.

Railing against St. Kathryn’s for not baptizing a baby whose family essentially intends not to be Catholic is like calling Dunkin Donuts intolerant for refusing to hire someone who intends never to sell donuts.  It’s like calling the police department hateful for firing an officer who refuses to fight crime.  It’s like calling King Arthur narrow-minded for not knighting someone who says he won’t defend Camelot.  There are certain things that Catholics are supposed to DO, just like there are certain things Dunkin Donuts employees or police officers or knights are supposed to DO.  The priest who won’t baptize is not saying God does not love that family; he’s not saying Jesus is not available to them; he’s not saying they are going to Hell!  He’s saying he will not make someone promise to raise a child in a Catholic family when they do not intend to raise the child in a Catholic family.  Attending Mass and being part of a parish family is a very basic and essential part of being a Catholic.  If you ask a priest for a Catholic baptism to enter your child into the Catholic faith and in the same breath tell him you do not intend to try and function as a Catholic, isn’t there a gaping logical contradiction there?  “I want my child to be Catholic but I do not want to be Catholic.”  In that situation a priest, if he is faithful and wise, encourages the parents to return to the Catholic faith before baptism is granted.

Imagine the awkward situation a couple would be faced with if a priest did allow a baptism in this case!  As part of a baptism ceremony the parents and godparents promise out loud in front of witnesses to raise the child in the Catholic faith.  Why would anyone want to lie about that --in a church no less?  If you believe the Catholic religion is wrong (for example about attending Mass), then why do you want to stand in a church holding your innocent baby and proclaiming that it is right, against your own conscience?  If you do not believe the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass –the "source and summit" of the Catholic religion—is important, then why stand up and say you do?  Why set yourself up to dishonor not only the Church but even your own beliefs?  Whatever happened to being true to oneself?  What is the point of forcing yourself to say things you do not believe?  Religion should never be coerced, not by one person to another, not by a government to a people, and not by a phony part of yourself to your true self.  If you believe Catholicism is wrong, abstain from being a Catholic unless or until you come to believe it is right.  Religion does not call for slaves but lovers.  Examine your motives.

                As for the thumbs commentator throwing around demeaning statements like people should not want to be Catholic “given the issues [the Church] had with pedophiles,” I’m sure you can see how that could be insulting to any faithful Catholic.  We have every bit as much disgust for pedophilia as non-Catholics do.  Pedophilia is not a teaching of our religion and never has been, just as flying planes into buildings is not a teaching of Islam.  In fact, from its inception the Catholic Church’s official teachings have been against not only the abomination of pedophilia but also any other sexual wrongs.  Sin is part of every man.  Mankind exists inside and outside the Church, so if you think you are going to escape the horror of sin, sexual or otherwise, simply by leaving organized religion, well, I’m sure you’ve already had your rude awakening.

                To the same commentator, who calls himself a "non-practicing Catholic":  what does that mean?  I eat meat every day.  Does that make me a non-practicing vegetarian?  My parents signed me up for ballet when I was in 2^nd grade and I stopped going after one season –does that make me a non-practicing ballerina?  Is someone wielding a machine gun simply a non-practicing pacifist?  Is someone who votes Republican all the time a non-practicing Democrat?  Putting the word “non-practicing” before a label basically negates it, unless you mean you think it is wrong not to practice and you hope to be able to do so in the future.  As the law of non-contradiction tells us, you cannot both believe and not believe at the same time.  Perhaps what most people mean by the nonsensical term “non-practicing Catholic” is “I was baptized Catholic but no longer consider myself part of the Catholic Church,” which is certainly a choice one can make, but please call it what it is.  If you are agnostic, say you are agnostic.  If you are a non-Catholic Christian, say it.  If you are not sure where you stand on Catholicism or on religion in general, say that.  Why cling to the Catholic name, albeit “non-practicing”, if you do not intend to be part of the Catholic Church and hold few if any of its beliefs?  You can be a Catholic who’s having a quarrel with a teaching of the Church; it’s natural and healthy to wrestle with and search deeply for truth.  But you can’t be a Catholic, “non-practicing” or otherwise, while at the same time hating the Church, being repulsed by it, or considering it optional.

Catholics practice their faith just as Jews, Muslims, Hindus, and other religious bodies practice theirs.  All Catholics fall short of perfectly practicing their faith.  We are sometimes uncharitable, gossips, lazy, adulterers, liars, abusers, greedy, or alcoholics just as any other humans might be.  But being Catholic requires us to recognize our weaknesses and make an honest effort to turn away from them many times throughout life in a process of continual conversion, from parishioners all the way on up to the Pope.  The sacraments are there for us when we see our weaknesses and desire to overcome them.  When we do not see our weaknesses and need a nudge back in the direction of our faith we should all be so lucky as to have a loving priest like the one at St. Kathryn’s reminding us of the way.  Five years ago when I came back to the Church after an absence of over a decade and was unable to receive the sacraments due to an immoral condition in my life it hurt, but the pain drove me to right that wrong and I am joyful for it now and able to participate fully at Mass.  Love is not just kindness.  Sometimes it is tough.  Sometimes it hurts.  Sometimes it bleeds to death on a cross before it saves.

I do hope the family involved comes back to their beautiful Catholic faith, but if they choose not to I hope they still find “the way, the truth and the life.”  Out of love He’s given us the Church to help and guide us, knowing how broken and in need of support and community and his body we are.  But He is out there for anyone who truly seeks, whatever church they attend or don’t attend, baptism or no baptism, religion or no religion, hard road or harder road, whether they know his actual name in life on earth or not.

Charlene Maniotis